Universal Grattitude and Saying Goodbye

I have been taking some time away from social media and virtual reality now that VitalCon is out of the way and I have been having a really long hard look at my life and surroundings.

Taking the space I need has been a welcome break, and clarity-inducing, prompting me to realise that the direction I am headed, isn't necessarily the way I want to go, in fact, I have seemed to have taken a huge detour and have lost myself to some degree. This break has lifted a weight off of my shoulders, and I have been making progress in my non-virtual reality life, away from the communities who have been such awesome support over these almost few years of this journey. 

When I first was introduced to the notion of impermanence, I resisted and tried to argue that from another perspective, once something exists, although it may transform into different things, that original something still will always and forever be in existence. I think both things are true. Nothing stays the same forever, but the something that it was is still something.

I have spent the last couple and a bit years deeply embedded with multiple virtual reality communities, like Together with Tripp, and Vitality ReAwakened.

But now it is time to say goodbye, take a step back unto thyself, and dampen the flow of cosmic energy and information which has been bombarding my mind and senses.

Something I haven't, but have wanted to, is written on this blog about physical and mental health, and well-being. 

Essentially, at the core, it's why I needed to begin Esoteric Student.

The seeking, searching, exploring, discovering, learning, practices, and religions, all comes down to the temple which is the self; the physical-and-mental-self-health.

Which is (in my opinion), the most esoterical study a person can do, because it is all we can do.

It is doing the 'thing', we are all trying to just do the 'thing'; I mean, at least, I know I'm trying to.

So what I am saying goodbye to, is Discord. I struggle socially, I know I do, but I don't always do the knowing at the same time as I'm doing the doing. And I can be a very ugly person on occasion. 

Esoteric Garden created by Anita; Finding Nimzy in VRChat

While I am taking the time I need, and doing some analysis, the vast majority of the negative situations stem from interactions via messaging using text. And I stopped using Facebook in any meaningful way quite some time ago. I can get quite passionate about things. I can have difficulties in reading tone. I overthink replies, and the edit feature on Discord allows for exacerbating it. I can get confused on knowing how to reply, and process interactions. And the list goes on. I think some of these things are related to my being autistic, and quite severely ADHD, along with a couple of other things.

I will keep my Discord account and check it every once in a while, and is the best way I have to keep up to date on events I enjoy attending, but for the most part, I am reverting back to my pre-Discord position of keeping all of my contact, relationships, and interactions with the virtual reality communities, virtual reality only.

Impermanence enters the equation due to my situation in life now, it is vastly different now compared to a few years ago. I'm now feeling somewhat settled into a new home, which I have only just begun to fix up and make it mine. 

I have new goals and ambitions in regard to this new home.

Something also has changed, and I have realised that I have become so distracted by virtual reality projects, narratives, and egotistical aspirations, that as I touched on at the start of this writing, I have lost my way, and who I am.

So, during this Discord hiatus, while planning out how I want my home to be, sat in my study/office, I also sat in my library, surrounded by many books, many great books of knowledge and intrigue.

While I was in a rough situation for a couple of years before moving home, I collected but was too distracted to get stuck really deeply into these pages, and I found myself using virtual reality and the communities as a distraction that I am only just waking up from now.

I didn't want to be a host, have an event in VR etc. 

What I wanted was to use virtual reality to learn, explore, discover, observe, and commune. And I also wanted to lose myself in my books, to review, write, make a video here and there, have the chance to do some interviews with people.

So these are the things I am now settled enough to concentrate on doing, on my own terms and timeline. And all while blocking out the noise of the things which no longer serve me.

There may or may not be another Medoké on the horizon, I'm not sure yet, but anyone can do that, it is just a concept, with the whole point in mind being, that everyone can do it, and anyone can. To be honest, the event at VitalCon is a heck of a high to go out on,. given its success and turnout. Of which, the video of the whole event is incoming, have no doubt about that.

The calendar of events I have the intention of providing will be watered down, and have the events I am going to, rather than getting lost down the black hole of trying to keep up with every event I can find listed. So I can concentrate on the things I want to do without burning out. My house and life away from all this included, of course. This isn't my job.

I don't want to be a widely known, or popular personality, or public figure, to get paid to do these things by monetising anything and losing my integrity and purpose. Heck, it is all reasons why I choose to remain anonymous also. I tried to come out and found it so terribly uncomfortable. Those who know, know, and those who don't, don't.

I'm passionately grateful for my time on Discord, and grateful to those who have provided and fostered the space for many people to share in some truly amazing and beautiful things together on their servers.

It is important to not misunderstand the words I'm writing, and what you're reading on this statement post. I am the issue that I have. The problem isn't with Discord, nor the communities, or the people, the beautiful and peaceful people. 

I have never come across such wonderful groups of individuals on the internet, at all. 

I am still going to be within their ranks and continue to interact, share, laugh, love, and enjoy their presence in my life, and I hope they feel the same way about me too!

Many of whom will be introduced to the pages within this humble blog of mine over time. 

I have a deep, meaningful, and real love for these human beings, I wouldn't be here without them, they have helped get me through some of the toughest times of my life. 

And so I know they understand that I must be Saying Goodbye to what I am.

Saying Goodbye has a very special place in my heart...because it is the name of an event I go to when I can stay up late enough to, run by a very special person, Tom Nickel, as part of his son's, Jeremy Nickel's, creative vision, who is the founder of Together With Tripp, formerly known as EvolVR.

Their work has had an incredible impact not just on mine, but on scores of people's lives all over the world. So I can highly recommend attending some of their events available not just in virtual reality, but on mobile, PC, Discord, and Spotify too thanks to their excellent event session leaders who are the best in the world at what they do. Bleeding edge stuff.

So with all that out of the way...

Until next time friends!

As the Dust Settles on a Magical First Vitality ReAwakened: VitalCon 2024

Wow, now the dust is settling well and truly on the experience of collaborating on my most recent adventure with Vitality ReAwakened, I feel fully satisfied of its...our, success.

I don't mean, success under one or more variable circumstance, I mean it in totality. This first VitalCon was awesome. This is from a perspective of the inside, behind the curtains, under the shrouded veil, so-to-speak.

Kinks in the chain did happen at certain intervals, but the ways resolutions appeared, appeased all parties became in fascinating, creative ways.

Everybody was able to grow in a great variety of ways, personally and collectively.

And I do mean everyone.

The creative team, organiser's, guest's, were made up of persons I have known for a good while now, who I appreciate, respect, and admire.

It was also made up of people who we are both new to me, as I to them, but now are familiar to one-another...and who now have my respect.

Are there things which could be done differently, yes, for sure, but not better than. Not for a first-time event as big as this.

14 different events of 3 days...let that sink in for a moment...

organised in around 3 months...vr assets included in that.

(I still am trying to let it sink in too!)

It began on January Third with the Opening Event, with Vitality ReAwakened Founder, Anita[FindingNimzy], who presented us with a very well produced video providing an overview titled Dream Journey of a Founder: The Road She Thought She Was Taking Led Somewhere Entirely Unexpected.

Visit: https://www.vitalityreawakened.com

It set the tone and vibe for, and throughout, the duration of VitalCon 2024.

Being part of something like this, has had a great impact on me, as you will come to see over the coming months via future blog posts, and a much larger project TBA.

The planning team really blossomed and by the finale it was obvious that relationships have been forged that go beyond that of which we were familiar of each other with.

There will of course be next year's VitalCon 2025! (That is all I can say on that front for now;)

The stars of the show were of course, our visitors, friends, family but all are our guests.

Everybody that attended showed many a great thing but grace, patience, presence, and kindness.

I attended every event but two. And it was amazing and humbling, which is our community in a nut shell.

Not one problem to be seen anywhere, from anyone.

Need I go on, or say more?

Sure, okay, it was fantastic to bare witness to.

And you might think this is a rare, or radical thing to be telling you, telling myself even; but it's not, and hasn't since day one of being in this community, or close by. 

The opposite, the rarity is the other, so rare that I as I write this cannot think of an example. 

But as I write this I do realise that this writing is radically profound of a thing to stop and put even more of a focus on this fact, than I already do...just incredible.

And definitely worth highlighting for anyone not in one of these communities, or can't understand, or visualise it, or VR.

I will be doing more of that.

Bravo to those who know, and were present.

To close this post up, here's an awesome recap created by Anita.

Indeed, They Are Only Getting Started!

And Vitality ReAwakened host's multiple weekly events.

If you would like to keep up to date on all things Vitality ReAwakened, and VitalCon 2025, join their Discord server here: https://discord.com/invite/uwTysFzEsu

An Esoteric Journey: So Far, Medoké, VitalCon2024, and Beyond

It has been two years and 4 months since beginning this path of exploration as an Esoteric Student. 

Essentially it is a journey of learning how to gain back some ground within my mental and physical health, and wellbeing.

During this time I have travelled between spaces and groups of others who all, in a great variety of different ways, are seeking, learning, teaching, and sharing experiences which are richly dense with wisdoms; for the mostpart in the names of love, life, and peace across mediums, formats, platforms accessible to everyone....one way or another.

I am aware that I have only just reached a tip of the preverbial iceberg. But this iceberg is more akin to a snowcone of sweetness and a variety of flavours, with plenty more still to discover.

The whole point of writing a blog, is to not only utilise the method for my own relief, but to share with others my findings in hope of making a difference to at least some-one persons out there, wherever there may be. 

A huge part of my life over the last couple of years has been spent within communities of people who have all found their ways to the best of what virtual reality has to offer; at the bleeding edge and forefront of physical and mental wellbeing. 

For a person like me, who can have a hard time socially, virtual reality has offered me a way of being able to develop personally, and experiencially grow gradually; comfortably.

Which brings me to the point of writing this post...

To get to this point in my life has taken a lot of peoples time, energy, guidance, and care converging unto myself.

Throughout which I have spoken a great many things about how I want to live my life, and my wants of things I'm to do once I am in a settled position to do so. And while I have spoken of my grattitudes along the way...it is now the time to start putting the money where my mouth is. This horse has been led to the water...nothing more can be done for me and I must drink.

So here are my pledges of intention birthed of grattitude.

Removing Barriers

Everyone faces barriers in life which come in as many forms as there are people, and my goal is to try in small ways to alleviate some which I have faced myself, which I hope can be of service to others. 

Esoteric Student Library

Originally, I created an online Esoteric Student Library filled with books, and essays, available to download instantly, for free for everyone.

This was my first conception and notion of the inception to the act of barrier removal in order to help people on their journeying and become their own Esoteric Sudent. 

While limitations can be useful in personal development and growth, brick walls can end paths before they begin. The internet can be a brick wall for many people when trying to scour and locate things such as books. 

You may end up somewhere uncouth, downloading viruses for example. Or never find what your looking for, heck, how do you even know what to look for when first setting out?

Since creating it though, I have took the decision to not risk any chance of issues with copyrights and things of the sort by having to reinstate a partial barrier. 

Currently, if one should happen upon the link to the library it will land you onto a 404 page in its place. 

However, all people need is a Gmail account and to send an email to library@esotericstudent.com providing a Gmail address to be added onto the permitted users access list and hey presto, you're good to go.

This is live, and available to do right now.

In fact, I think it retains an element of the esoteric, mystery aspect to all of this in it having to be done this way but be quick because I am still toying with the idea of it becoming a membership perk. 

With over 40k different books, files, documents, essays and images in my collection being uploaded to it over time, it is for sure something to check out.

Something I am missing in my life is responsibility, accountability, and routine.

Being held to account is important for personal development. Being dependable, and forming structure to one's life, with a solid commitment has to be built upon solid foundations. 

With these things comes purpose and meaning to the why's and what's we do.

So the next announcements are things which are reasonably within the borders of what I can keep up with regularly.

Esoteric Student Events Calendar and Resources Directory Database

While on my adventures I have attended many events, and found resources across multiple medium formats, and platforms accessible to everyone.

So, from February 2024, I will be posting the events schedule daily to EsotericStudent.com in a dedicated section, and provide daily, an email to anyone who chooses to receive it. 

Containing all the necessary information, such as platforms, devices required, links, timezones, community's, genre/category, and so on, this will be a one-stop solution designed to remove as many barriers to access as possible towards helping not only those who wish to find and attend such events, but to help those who have events to be found.

Alongside this is an easy to use and search directory, containing information of those in the wider health and wellbeing community who have something to share, safely and of value.

This includes any group, event, and sessions leaders personal projects who you may meet at the events scheduled, as well as attendees.

Since the closing of a virtual reality social platform AltspaceVR it became glaring that there are people and pockets of communities out in the wilds now, from the AltspaceVR days who were affected by its demise due to ASVR having an events board which was easy to follow. 

Losing that was detrimental to many, including myself, and my hope is that bridges can be begun to be built crossing the gaps, but also revitalised by others sharing this information and putting it out there too. And I know some are also working on do the same.

The goal is to not only bring together the old school, but to bring many fresh faces to these events and to broaden the wider health and wellbeing community of which we are all a part of.

The objective of bringing people together, and promoting inclusivity, is the theme I wish to continue carrying forward into as many aspects of Esoteric Student as I can; which brings me to these next couple of announcements.

Medoké event banner for VitalCon 2024

Medoké 

At some point along the way, quite a while ago, 18 months roughly, discovering the aforementioned inspired me to want to have my own small event in virtual reality.

I wanted to interview people in front of a small live audience, record it and create a podcast. 

The premise being centered around the notion that everybody is unique, and no one life experience is the same as any other, everybody has at least one peice of wisdom that nobody else has. 

So in 6 word or less, I ask what is the wisest, most unique to you, and valuable life lesson that you would like to put out into the world?

And the conversation goes on from there.

An Evolution of this format is...Medoké!

What in the world is Medoké?! Is something you may be finding yourself wondering...

Something which has helped me so so much in these couple of years is meditation. Prior to venturing forth as an Esoteric Student I had never meditated, but that changed when I met the wonderful over at 'Together With Tripp', formerly known as EvolVR. 

Attending their events multiple times each day in virtual reality had an instant big impact in my life, even while at first I literally had no idea what it was exactly we were supposed to be doing. So for a while there I was doing a different style to the rest of those there...oops.

I can't thank them enough, the core community welcomed me with open arms, and has only ever shown me love and kindness. In my own way, I am working towards returning to them in kind, all that they have offered, and all that I have taken...but more on that shortly.

I have found other groups and communities out there in the wilds who run different styles, and themes, and informational nuggets of gold, just like Together With Tripp also does. 

At these events people have check-in rounds, and check-outs too, where those who are there share their experiences, and briefly touch on things which arose during the session. 

With a vast array of community members, both diverse and rich with knowledge, and experience, many things spoken catch my attention when it comes to peoples personal practices, but the sessions come to a close and I'm left to wonder, wanting to know more. I know I can't be the only one.

I even have heard it mentioned by some that they would like to try their hand at leading a meditation to a live audience, and present to others their favourite practices, myself included has said and thought this. I also wonder how many think it but haven't said it out loud?

But where can we find a live audience and the space setup to present our practices?

In virtual reality, a hugely popular activity people really enjoy is VR Kareoke.

At this point I think you know whats coming next...Medoke is the combination of meditation and kareoke...Medoke is meditation kareoke!

Inspiration is infectious, and I found myself saying this not long ago, "If we can find inspiration within our-'self'; the rest will follow, as we already have what we need..."

I strongly believe it to be true, I must do because I said it while inspired, as a description to how I interpret the feeling present and in that moment, with awareness and curiosity.

And so my hope and aspiration is to provide people with the platform to be inspired, and empowered to guide others for 10 minutes, during which, the space is yours, and your audience.

But I can't provide the space alone; alas...I am not alone.

Vitality ReAwakened, is a very special community I met during the time I spent in AltspaceVR.

Created by Anita, and Kaiju and Jose, have built a strong foundation which at the core, is aimed at removing barriers for people to find, revisit, and ReAwaken our Vitality.

It is something which they have consistently providing throughout the whole time I have known them. And they have projected a lot of really great, positive and inspirational events in virtual reality.

The barriers Vitality ReAwakened removes includes providing people with a space, and platform, to teachers, guides, leaders, doctors, professors, people who have something to share, and students.

And this includes myself, with Esoteric Student. For which I'm immensely grateful to Anita and the team of creators who collaboratively make any of this possible.

Thank you Vitality ReAwakened!

So...Medoké, what to expect?

At this 1 hour and 20 minute event, 2/3 people will have the floor to lead a 10 minute meditation each, with a short interview by the host, Esoteric Student, and an oportunity for the guide and audience to engage with each other, right after, prior to the next guides time.

We are in need of participants for the alpha phase, during which we will better determine timing and structure for future events. 

You are a perfect candidate if you would like to stretch your limits, experience something new and amazing, and be a part of setting the foundation for a unique event that will touch many lives over time!

If you would like to apply, or for more information please send an email to medoke@esotericstudent.com 

“Medoké"

The community project I'm involved with, VitalCon, is coming up really soon, January 3rd it all kicks off.

It is being an eye opening experience, seeing some of what happens behind the scenes of, what is scheduled as of now, a showcase of sixteen events! 

I myself have settled into the project, and my roles, of which some are born again unto me from previous experiences.

Esoteric Student though, is from the pov of a journalistic, experientialist, documentarian, aka blogger. Not just words though.

So, now it is time to end this transmission of bounty, by saying that I hope a happy holiday to all...

Please do check out VitalCon 2024's website if you're at all curious.

Until next time friends.

https://discord.com/events/795363360845201418/1185465975424962560

 

VitalCon 2024 Reveal Party!

I am so hyped to invite you all to an event that is a multi-collaboration, only made possible by the amazing Vitality ReAwakened community.

This makes it Esoteric Student's very first foray at being involved in live events!

The VitalCon 2024's Reveal Party, November 18, 2023, on Engage XR and VRChat to kick off this wholesome Vitality ReAwakened multi-day January 4-6th celebration-of-self event.

Step into a mesmerizing virtual realm where pulsating beats & electrifying rhythms converge in this dreamscape dance party where we reveal big news!

#VitalCon2024 "From Vision to Vitality – Your Journey Into Change"

Engage XR:VR, PC, Mobile
VRChat: VR, PC

This Event is Sponsored by Educators In VR